My Five
I was
Taught that one’s life is the sum total of ones five closest friends. These are
my five as of this date in 2019
They are
(initial’s only) MB, DR, HP, RM, and CH. And a couple of honorable mentions. I
know their families, and there are only excellent and impressive folks that
anyone can look up to. I will show the aspects of these my friends “M.B. the
Balanced one” D.R. the Strong one” R.M. the Steadfast one. H.P. the Man of
Faith C.H. The professional. I also have a couple of honorable mentions R, C,
and S, D.
M, B, The
Balanced Family man. MB is in my five because he has taken the road that was
bumpy and has come out on the other side.
He has taught at the college level and has a successful business. His
experience, whether it is how things have changed in the US military, or just
shooting the breeze to teaching me the correct technique for trigger pull to keep the
holes on the paper and not in the dirt next to it. He has been a fountain of
excellent advice over the years I have known him. I 1st met him in 2002, and we
have been friends since the initial meet.
However, the thing that stands out the most is how he relates to his
grandchildren. We have something that we
all share, we are patriarchs of blended families; we have been married before.
I, however, took it to an extreme with my four previous attempts that had ended
for one reason or another that left me in a miserable state in 2006 when I
prayed (in tears) for another chance. That prayer was answered with the family
that calls me PAPI today. He is an
example to me of what I can be as a grandfather, and as a person.
D.R “The
man that will never quit” He, M, B and I are the trio that refers to themselves
as the “Irreverent Three” for the carpool we participated in during my time at
Holloman AFB during my employment in my 2nd career as a computer tech. Where do
I start with him? Diagnosed with a
severe illness before we really met his drive and fire allowed him to drive
through his treatment returning to work months later, upon his return, he was
just as productive as ever. His example that stands out is the love he has for
his family and his family for him. Before he moved to his next employment
location, we would have quarterly staff meetings for the Irreverent Three at a
local restaurant. This was an event
where the spouses would attend, and we would laugh and reflect on the previous
4 months and have a ball with the stuff that had happened seeing it was amusing
4 months later.
Additionally, his trailer was the meetup the place before NMSU
football games where libations and tailgate cuisine was consumed with
gusto. The strength of the bond between
him and his wife TR is one of the strongest I have witnessed. They stick with
each other like glue and always have each other’s backs. They live daily the
admonition. “What God has joined together let no man put asunder” I’ve seen it
in action, and it’s a beautiful thing to behold. Recently he has fallen ill
with a similar malady as the 1st time, and through it all, he and his espoused
are as steadfast as ever.
R, M the
Straight shooter. I have known RM for over 45 years. We literally spent summers
elbow to elbow marching and making music until he departed for the ARMY in
1976. The exciting thing is that we had not seen each other in the intervening
years until 2001 shortly before I retired from the USAF. He knows 2 of my former spouses. That’s how
far we go back. We have some fascinating
history, in 2005 I baptized him in the Gulf of Mexico after expressing his wish
to be. When he visited me on his way to see his family, as I was strategically
placed on his route home, he would stay and attend church with us. I have known
his bride for just as long as I have known him. As we would be together every
summer from 1974 until we aged out or moved on to the next adventure, marching
and playing music. (that’s another story.) During that trip to beautiful Ft
Walton Beach, FL. We discussed the
trials that he and his bride were going through as a result of a severe illness.
After being told her news with a date stating when it would all end, I am proud
to announce that she is still here keeping him and indirectly me in line
especially when I found myself in an unsupervised state (divorced.) My Wife WC and her hit it off, and they got
along like sisters after only one meeting.
The only disappointment was that he departed from that lovely area (the
Redneck Rivera) to Ft Leavenworth KS. Before you ask, he just works there, and
I visited them there as well. He owns
property in the Sarasota area (Sunny Florida), and I have been informed that I
am welcome to come to see him at any time. That is so happening. Recently we
had a form of the last supper together. We last met during a TDY (Temporary
Duty) in El Paso. It was the last
supper as it was about a week before my Gastric Bypass Surgery. Bout the
straight shooter bit. I recently sold my Camaro and cleared several bills to
become debt-free as I am planning to retire in the next few years. He wrote,
and I quote. “I see you have grown up
and stopped driving your D##K around” I immediately called him and asked him.
“Do you know why I love you brother, because you only have one pitch, not the
curve, nor the slider, nor the off-speed. No, you throw straight HEAT, and it’s
just how I hate it high and tight. I can rely on him always telling the truth
(albeit) from his perspective.
H, P the
Man of faith. HP and I were at one
point, attended the same church. I was on the ministry team which ended through
my error of judgment, based on my anger (that’s for my memoirs) There was a
point in time where there were difficult times for my brother. when he called,
I opened the church so we could pray together for a resolution to the issue
(which has been resolved) in a fantastic way.
During this period, he left for an assignment at another base, as he was
on active duty a little longer than I. I traveled to his location more than
once to encourage him. I took a road
trip to see him (with the new Camaro) for a trip to Dallas. We had some great
food, great conversation, and perfect times.
I’ve gone to see him several times over the last few years, and it never
gets old. Whenever trouble appears, and
we have our phone call, I would only ask one question when the subject comes
up. What did your mother say? You know
we are of one mind on this, and you know what she would say. Bout that resolution of his previous
situation. The best analogy is to refer to the latter end of a JOB when he got
all his stuff back with interest. My friend is a software developer, Ph.D.
Candidate and an Instructor at an online university. No matter the time we are apart, his counsel
is valued. When I am in trouble spiritually, I call him.
C, H. the
Tenacious one. This man I have known since on or about 2002. His family are
great people (as are all the rest of my 5) it was my pleasure to work with him
during my time working at Holloman AFB NM. Now there is another person that
gets mentioned with this association is R who works hand in hand with C, Hand is just as dedicated this is for him ROLL TIDE!
Unbeknownst to me, I met his espoused at the end of my time on active duty
during my last duty assignment. R's wife was the command administrative
professional. The same thing goes for his family as well. I saw their kids grow
up to be superb human beings. What I
remember about C, H her was there for me when I was about to make a big
mistake. Not only did he step in to defuse this situation, but he also advised
me of the error I was about to make saving my azz in the process.
When I lost a close friend at the beginning phases of a relationship, he was
there for me through my emotional mess, losing someone suddenly like that. As
if that was not enough. He was the 1st person I introduced my current espoused
to when I took her on one of our 1st dates. It wasn’t planned that way;
However, when I entered the restaurant “Mimi’s café, our two became 4 at the
table immediately. They were pleased with the prospect of me (the crazy
divorced guy running wild) settling down with someone that I could take home to
mother. Since mom and dad were watching from above, they were the next best
thing. I will state that there were a lot of introductions during this period,
but this is about the “5” I will write on the person that saved my bacon to
keep me from living in my car in another tale of transition. He (the devil) got me interested in putting
holes in paper on the range and was generous to a fault. He has had health challenges as of late, and
when one of them put him in a hospital in Las Cruces, I left work in El Paso to
let him know I had his back. Whenever I get a free evening, I try to go to
Alamogordo and set up dinner with his family and talk a lot of stuff in the
friendly way we do.
Honorable
Mentions.
R, C, the
Sage mentor. I worked with R, C during
my time at Bare Base at Holloman AFB from 1996 to the end of my time in the
military. The truth is that I wanted to be like him when I grew up. Heck, I
still do. He knew his job backward and forward, was a world traveler spending
time in several locations (some hotspots) as a civilian worker. Tropics, deserts, you name it he went there.
Additionally, he has remained in excellent shape and staying tremendously
healthy and fit even to this day. He has encouraged me to continue writing and
gives me the inspiration to continue my growth as a person and a writer. Every time we communicate, I learn something
new. I just recently (within the last 3
Years) found that we are really close to the same age. To quote Anthony Hopkins in The Edge, “If
one can do so can another”
S, D Give
me liberty or give me death. S, D was
one of my 1st Sergeants that I remain friends with to this day. Totally down to
earth there is no sugarcoating, there are no apologies, and there is no room for
anyone that doubts his dedication to the republic for which it stands. When he
takes a stand on principle it without reservation or apology, It’s been too
long since we have sat down for lunch. His tenacity for the truth is what I
respect in him. I will tell a joke that
he said at my retirement luncheon. “When
Sergeant Crawford joined the military there were only two Major commands…. Mount and dismount. Much
respect S, D
J.C "Sensi" and I met in 1996 during
the drawdown in my career. I had
significant anxiety about my coming career change, as though I loved my career
field, I longed for a change becoming an IT professional. He was already there.
We met as coaches of little league football teams. He was an IT contractor for
the Base Hospital. I asked him what do I
need to do to be a computer professional. He actually laid out a plan for
getting this done before my retirement in 2001. I actually followed those
plans, and I had the pleasure of seeing him on the interview board when I
interviewed for the position I currently hold.
He, in fact, works down the hall from me to this day.
His
Strengths are his tenacity and resolve. When he tackles a problem, he stays
with it until its either found impossible or corrects it. Another one of his strengths is his
compassion and dedication, which he possesses in greater quantities than anyone
I have ever known. He is devoted to his
family no matter what. And through the trials “that were intense,” he came
through each of them. With his integrity intact. I have a point where I will go
dark on someone with problems that they refuse to deal with or correct, but he
never does. He remains steadfast throughout.
He is gracious to those not deserving of grace. Lets things develop to
the point where it is evident that its time to move on, but stays a little
longer. He is a man of GOD. Constantly reading the word and refreshing his soul
from it. For those reasons, he should be on my list, and I could not leave him
and the other Honorable mentions not noted. That would be unfair and inaccurate
to not include them as my story is incomplete without them.
