Thursday, November 25, 2010

Thankful

Well folks its Thanksgiving  seeing I am writing this for my facebook blog here goes.  There are 331 of you that are my friends at todays count..Of the vast majority of you we share something special in common. It could be that we walked the same Dirt,Sand,Mud, or Football fields in the Heat Cold Wet and Dry I mean like in person. Rode in buses with some of you with the AC not working a driver that could not hit all the gears without grinding or some of you that put me under the stage cause I snored too loud. (I know who you are) LOL  . Some of you we have talked about stuff you messed up and came to me wanting to know what to do (Yes Active Directory databases can be recovered) I have gone to chruch with a few to pray after hours and in an empty building with the only audible voices were ours. I have stood in the doorway of the offices of a few and said someting like "I think I really messed up this time" or more often "What it be like homey/Homegirl" Some of you are my Brothers from other Mothers and Sisters from other Misters. I also have I have Niceses that I love to pieces. A couple of you were there for me when I was at my lowest poing in my life and hung with me. Some of you I look at and say " I wish they could see what I see when I look at them. Some of you have known me since the 60's some the 70's and amazingly still like me... The rarest of you actually have met each one of my 3 Ex's and the one that has already crossed over to the other side.  You are all still my friends and am thankful for that. Some of you knew me when I was a Power Drinker, Rabble Rouser and Rice Paddy Daddy. "Were the boys from COD and raiders of the night" (I know raiders is the wrong word but this is Rated G). Shout out to all present and former Wolf Puppies, temoporary residents of "A-Town" at the Kun (You aint been packed until you have been WOLFPACKED) and Gate 2 street in Okinawa. (There was this pastry shop right out the gate that had the nicest apricot pastry thingies) Some of you knew me as coach, or the coach of your son when I coached football (I miss that) I dont think any of you knew me during my feeble attempt to be a defensive back at Cal state Fullerton (I should have ran track)  Some of us stand on different sides of the Ideological fence thats cool, but that does not mean cause I do not agree with you dosen't mean I don't love you. There are always things we can agree about.  Some of you knew me when I was on the platform of my local church... That was long ago in a galaxy far far away. Got blasted through a wormhole of my own creation and am now heading back through it (but even at light speed it is still a long way to go to get back home.)  Some of you know me at a Karaoke dude that does a mean Stevie ray Vaughn  Cab Calloway or George Thurgood.  I'd like to acknowledge a few that I dont communicate with as much as I should. You are special to me because we shared a friend that is no longer here that was my best friend and wingman that I miss badly. I have a picture of her in her Desk that her family graciously gave me after her passing and even though I dont say it I care for all you. I have children that (Thank God are my friends) one Grandson that I have met, and another that I can't wait to make my aquantince with.  I also have a couple of friends that I sometimes think "I wonder what would actually happen if I pressed that RED button" (Evil laugh)  To all my surrogate childeren, I am honored to know all of you and the ones I don't see anymore  I miss you. One of you is leaving me, and I'm jealous cause you will get to go to some cool concerts, malls restaurants and stuff. Dont worry about how expensive you only pass this way but once. Bout that when you move be careful about those boundries that I told you about ... I have to give a shout out to two of you.  My Div 1 Basketball hoopster and Alpha Bravo WAAS UP!!!  now the last group of you "folks i have not met"  We share a belief system that ties us together" though we may never meet I respect all of you....   Ok that being said  This Thanksgiving I am thankful for all of you, as my life as it currently configured would be dimished and I would not be the person that I am if not for knowing you.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Don't Quit

One of my first experiences of being ashamed of myself was in a footrace. For the wrong reasons I chose to go to Cal State University Fullerton instead of going to the University of Oregon. I shoulda left home (side note) Eugene Oliver Crawford MY DAD used to say if you put coulda woulda and shoulda in one hand and crap in the other which one will get filled first (end of side note) My roomate was a sprinter in high school, and challenged me to a race we would race for a mile. My mile times at the end of high school were in the mid-4 low 5 minute area. depending on which way the wind was blowing.. We took off he was off like a shot he had be by a half a lap by the time I got one lap down. By the way we got to 880 yards (yes it was a long time ago) he was laboring I started closing the gap by the way we got to the last 220 yards we were even. As we rounded the last turn he started his kick. I just knew I could not keep up with him and I shut it down. When we got to the end he told me "Manny I had nothing left I was done if you would  have kept on and sprinted with me I would not have had the gas to finish dude you had me dead to rights" I felt so ashamed and upset. I didnt believe in myself. I didnt have the guts to finish what I started. Now at this phase in my life I look at some of these things and think.  What if I would have fought for it?

The Merovingian logic



Just in case you didnt know the Merovigian was a character in the movie "Matrix Reloaded" that held the KeyMaker hostage

The merovingian logic can be summed up in one phrase "how can you have time if you don't take time"... We go through our lives wishing for something, anything that may make us feel important, needed, wanted, or stuff like that. I have a interesting proposal. TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF.  I remember my 1st job in IT. I was introduced to a room full of processor upgrades. It was literally Full like two offices had the wall between them removed and one room was full from the floor to the ceiling with upgraded processors that I had to replace, along with my other duties. Being ex military I was going to work overtime to get this done, but my boss told me a better way.  He said  "Manny you can work overtime for the next 3 months and you will not put a sizable dent in this pile of work, and if you become a burn out I will fire you… so I took my lunches and unless I had someone at my door at closing time with a problem that "had to be fixed before tomorrow" which was rare I was long gone at 5… What is my point Life is too short to be wrapped around the axle with jobs that won't be completed that day anyway.   I remember the song "Cats in the Cradle" and the pertinent line is "we will get together then son, we are going to have a good time then". The then never came, and I shout to the rafters this one thing, TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF and your needs. The job will be there when you get back no one will think any less of you (unless you take this to the extreme and become a slacker) the job does not define you… The job is not you. The job is how you eat regularly put your kids through school, buy cool stuff and live indoors.  The sooner we realize that the better we will feel. I think some among us that do not have an identity outside of the job. Some among us that think the job is where we are thought of as good and do not see the internal good within us… to those that think that I have a simple thought Get a life.  You are a unique beautiful person and nothing you do (short of dog fighting) will make anyone think any more or less of you… so Take the time.
Go get a massage, take a friend to dinner, see a movie, anything that does it for you. You will thank me afterward after all "how can you have time if you don't take time